Cobblepot Breaks the Pot


Night time sharpens, heightens each sensation
Darkness stirs and wakes imagination
Silently the senses abandon their defenses

‘You don’t suppose Bruce would just abandon Gotham at the hands of a lone individual and skedaddle forever, did you? Honestly, I don’t buy this whole ludicrous blandishment of “Anyone Can Be Batman”,’ said the Penguin, as The Phantom of the Opera played in the background.

‘I am Ostwald Cobblepot and I am the Penguin. No one, after me, can become the Penguin. Oswald Cobblepot is the only true Penguin, you see what I mean?’ asked the King of Spies, walking side to side on his highly furbished private boat called, The Penguin.

Close your eyes and surrender to your darkest dreams
Purge your thoughts of the life you knew before
Close your eyes, let your spirit start to soar
And you’ll live as you’ve never lived before

‘I don’t know what I have to believe anymore. What is made up and what is the truth? This is all so complex and shady. I mean, where the hell is Bruce?! Trust me, even with the Joker and Bane masquerading and tearing the City to pieces, it was much simpler when he was here,’ said Gordon, wrapped in a blanket and clutching a glass of Whiskey.

‘Listen, Gordon, for people like us, there is no retirement. You know, the feeling of wanting to settle down is really unsettling,’ said the Penguin and smirked, as he light up a cigar that he had only recently smuggled from Cuba. ‘Vigilantes, drug-lords, Mafioso, Commissioners and criminals…we don’t retire easy. We always keep going, right until the puck drops from hell and our individual worlds, as we know it, collapses,’ beamed the Penguin and sat down right next to Gordon. He then put his hands around the commissioner and sad, ‘Bruce, however, wanted to try and see how Gotham can sustain without him. He made Gotham his ant farm and well, the results thus far hasn’t been really satisfying, I must say.’

‘So, you are his man on the ground?’ asked Gordon softly.

‘Oh, no, God no. I am nobody’s man. You see, I am a man of business,’ said the Penguin with pride. ‘I answer to my customers only and that is it. Bruce has commissioned my services and boy does he pay me well!’

Let your mind start a journey to a strange new world
Leave all thoughts of the life you knew before
Let your soul take you where you long to be
Only then can you belong to me

‘What services?’ enquired Gordon.

‘Well, I spy for him. I have contacts all across town. The bartenders, strippers, cabbies, clerks, gardeners, chefs, homeless…let us not get into details now, it will be in my best interest to do so. Anyway, the point is, I own almost half of the people in the city. They all answer to me, the Penguin,’ said Ostwald, raising his hands high up in the air. ‘I utilize their eyes and ears well and pass on the information to Lucius.’

The moment Gordon heard the name Lucius, he immediately jerked, ‘Lucius? You are in touch with Lucius Fox?!’

‘Well, there are a few places where human eyes and ears can’t reach.’


‘And let’s just say that Fox has a few gizmos up his sleeve, which can reach where no man can ever.’

‘Does the Wayne Enterprises R&D…’

‘I’m really not going to answer any questions on that topic, commissioner, with all due respects,’ said the Penguin hotly and stood up.

Gordon knew there was nothing he could do to extract answers out of the Penguin. Especially not when he was under the man’s mercy. ‘Okay, now how do I know you work for Bruce?’

‘For one, I knew that I had to save your ass on time and secondly, I wouldn’t have really twitched for a second if someone were to blow your brains off. I hate you, quite frankly. But I just put myself out there and left a strong message for our enemies too, just for the sake of my noble customer. However, if you are looking for any kind of proof, Commissioner, I’m afraid you aren’t going to get any. My customer needs me to not disclose any information about his current whereabouts and well, I will respect that.’

‘Why would you want to go against the Joker? Aren’t you like one of them? You too are on the Batman’s Blacklist, if I may,’ said Gordon inquisitively.

‘Well, the Joker is crazy. We need sensible men to run Gotham. I need to run my business here. Joker is a mad man. He just does things impulsively. He doesn’t think about the consequences of his irrational actions.’

‘Commissioner, back then, we let let him go on with his plan because he promised to kill the Batman, which he obviously failed. Then came along Bane and we had to run for our lives. Business went berserk and I had to face terrible loss. I cannot let that happen again,’ said the Penguin and then added with more emphasis, ‘”We” cannot let the retards, the psychos and the wackos run this city. We need businessmen, capitalists, people with true power…those who can think sanely and those who can enforce action in order to run this city and restore back order.’

‘So that means you want the Batman gone too?’

‘Of course! I most certainly do. Once you help me get rid of the Joker and his filthy Batmen, I will go after the Batman, I give you my word. Then, I will end you too.’

You alone can make my song take flight
Help me make the music of the night


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